we all should
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Jallers! Feel free to stalk and leave me some love.

Here's a collection of my everyday failures, love, adventures, and sheer randomness.

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my baby, Pepito
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Image Hosted by ImageShack.us I'm Nica. Age 20. A Fine Arts student, Photographer, Company Artist and a full time blogger. I'm pretty sure you know what I blog about (for the avid readers. ofcourse!). I blog about absolutely anything I could think of and dears, sorry in advanced. Most of them are non-sense. I have a love-hate relationship with cab drivers. I procrastinate a lot. And I love like a hopeless romantic.

I do consider myself a workaholic although again like what I said earlier I PROCRASTINATE A LOT. Money makes me happy. I dance and shout once I touch paper bills that are mine. And the thought of being uber rich in the future just makes me feel contentment in life. LOL!

Not a fan of blog leaves. I'll try my best not to do so.

I love hugs and tagboard messages so please give me some. :)

Comment on the tagboard. (my comment box isn't working in this layout.)


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Music Playlist at MixPod.com

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*HUGS* TOTAL! adik ako sa yakap mo.
Get hugs of your own
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stalk me more
stalk my cool life.
the human friendster.
rant, rant, ranting.
feeling artist.(new)
in your face.
the unsecret blog.
watch me banana dance.(new)
online photofolio.(new)
the clickr.



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Adtu One Love
Agatha Geron
Aiwa Bagatt
Ava Te
Ayla Peña
Bombee Duerme
Chikay Kupel
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Judy Zabala
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Ken Cultura
Ken Cultura Part2
Khan Larracas
Lolit Solis
Louie Magano
Macci Macaranas
Mackyboy Cabasal
Nigel Sioson
Reg Sulit
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Naomee
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reminiscing
April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 August 2010

gimme some lovin'




give me this and i'll give you the world
cute backpack.
baguio date.
euro trip.
NL.
red bikini.
hug shirt.
earth na stressball.
disney princess slumbook.
cinema one.
VHS player.
highschool day.
makahiya on a pot.
jompy.


*Update this soon. And movies to watch.*

she did my layout
layout tm / dd

Monday, June 30, 2008
filipino feelings:part1.
10:34 PM
baket ako nageemo ngayon? well, hindi naman talaga ako nageemo kung nakikita nyo ko ngayon. sheesh! i just need an outlet. sorry blog.

im kinda bothered. about something said which i couldn't comprehend at the beginning and until now. what i couldn't understand was that "feeling". why must i think that? jdhfdshgdshgkldsfovjdsjvkldshnviodskvjdsjvl!!!!

emotions emotions.

filipino feelings. GRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!

it scares me.


i need more happy songs. emoness sucks my brain as of the moment.


"Govinda Jaya Jaya
Gopala Jaya Jaya
Radha Ramanahari
Govinda Jaya Jaya.."

HAPPY SONG NGA EH! AMP AMP!

please NOL, make it a better day. make it reach you. make it happen. make dreams come true. make us real. make up. make out.

OMG!! speaking of MAKEOUT!

since the lights inside the pavs were turned off when we got dismissed, it was true, some people took the opportunity to make babies. haha! i saw someone making out at pav4. SHET! pav4. you know how much i love you but people cant respect you. hahaha!

when i saw them, i was like a kid who covered my eyes and walked as fast as i could. just to get away from that "rated" scene. pero grabe! it made my day. sobra sobrang LOL yung naganap sa buhay ko tonight. :)) grabe! ang wrong. ANG WRONG MAKAKITA NG TAONG NAGMMAKEOUT SA PUBLIC. para akong naOP. :))

MAKE OUT MAKE OUT MAKE OUT!


pero grabe, filipino feelings talaga eh. UMAYOS KA NGA, NICA! wag mong antayin na nakadrafts na ang secret blog mo.



to congressman.
10:18 PM
i remember that moment when i sneaked past 12 just to talk to you online. how barely you use the internet and how you started to get hooked into it because of me. i remember days when my heart would stop on the sight of your name. when it pops at the lower right part of my screen. when my heart skip beats. when i go crazy about you. when i WAS crazy about you.

wow! am i actually reminiscing our online days?

GAH!

just wanted to say that, its not you anymore. who would make my heart stop. who pops anywhere and everywhere. who makes my heart skip beats. who makes me go crazy.

pero nakakamiss. those were the days, "labs". eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! :)


Sunday, June 29, 2008
dear sir vitug.
10:32 PM



sir,
patawarin nyo ko. hindi talaga yan blue in real life. PROMISE! patikim lang yan. PROMISE! maganda yan. PROMISE! tulad ng sabi mo. PROMISE!


LABYU!!



on boxing and being stupid.
3:02 PM
"this my dream
COME TRUE."

-Manny Pacquiao

"thanks God. thanks God."
-nanay ni Pacquiao



well, you see. it runs in the blood. (FUCK! nakalimutan ko yung disclaimer. it runs in the blood yung sabi ni teta. pinagsama nya yung "it runs in the family" and "its in the blood".)



berries and cream.
1:44 PM
due to the bad weather (which is obviously a good one for me to begin with), i just want to get my mind of plates for a while.

jeez! it's a sunday and its raining again. makes me want to sleep again. I'M LOVING THE WEATHER TO BITS.

anyways, last night was LOVE.

sooooo... DREAMY. :)

i just cant wait to get home.
i love you berry delight. but you know, YOU ARE SO EFFIN EXPENSIVE NOW! but i love you anyways.

strikethrough strawberry cheesecakes at cupcakes by sonja. slash strikethrough


Friday, June 27, 2008
gift ko kay jomp.
10:19 PM
WAIT LANG! hindi lahat toh gift ko. :)) yung huli lang. AMP! (grabeng disclaimer)

pacute ko epal!

anorexic.

photos and makeup by macci.

(patikim palang yan. para sa mga stalkers ko yan out there. HAHAHA!)

yung isa pinagtyagaan na ng 30 mins eh. loyal ka ha!

happy birthday, june my love. :)

JOMPY! nagpaparamdam na yung bag sayo.

gib me!




I AM TRULY, MADLY, DEEPLY IN LOVE WITH MYSELF.



sumosobra ka na!
9:56 PM
sabi nga sa they kiss again subtitles na uber laughtrip, "YOU ARE SO OVERBOARD."


OVERBOARD KA NA!
tandaan mo!
ako ang magwawagi sa huli.
BWAHAHAHA!



RAINBOW!!
9:24 PM
why i love advertising?
it makes this fugly third world country a pretty place.
(too bad i cant post the pics now. blame it to my techy-less cutesy couple phone.)
but to spoil you a bit,
since i cant show you the "realization trigger" just yet,
i saw the CUTEST escalator ever ever!
super my eyes went all "WHOA!"
8-O
the escalators sides were sticked with the lipton milk tea ad
A LOOOOONG RAINBOW tickled my eyes.
sheessh!! i'm happy now.
i totally forgot i haven't brought my ipod with me.
but anyways, i was singing.



future forecast.
8:45 PM
when i reach the age of 25, i will be independent and rich. i party hard but i work harder. by that time, i'm probably saving for my dream house.

you see, i dont live with my parents when i reach 25. 25 is kinda old already. hopefull by 23 i'm out of this house. i probably live in a condo somewhere in makati. i've got my car (a gift from papa if possible). hopefully, by that time gasoline isn't that expensive anymore. i have a driver, he's kinda old but really really nice. he reminds me of mang tony (our family driver when i was a kid. he gives me mentos everytime we see each other until i grew up. but when i grew up, i kept on asking for mentos but he gives me white toblerone which is obviously better.) i get hot choco from starbucks every morning.

i go to places. out of the country most of the time. i roam around europe for fun. eat the BEST steak i ever tasted at venice, italy. eat haagen daz strawberry ice cream at london. and enjoy summers at newyork just like the good old days.

probably i'll be married to some guy i'm madly in love with. the dream house will be the party place. i don't really mind paying for everything everynight because i'm just uberly rich.

i'll have 3 kids but i wont get fat. i'll still be eating that way, like a pig. and still stay slim for all i care.

I"M SO EXCITED TO BE RICH! WAAAH!

now, i must find ways on how to make it posible as early as now. (must type it in wiki)



nightmare.
8:35 PM
i had the scariest dream EVER EVER last night.

i was perspiring when i woke up at macci's. it wasn't only because the aircon was turned off. i just forgot why.

the setting was an art app class. we were reciting and all then as i was speaking, i got barok. FUCK FUCK FUCK!! :(( and then papa joms told khan, "i told you she's barok."

THAT WAS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO....ugh! darn it!

i dont like to be barok. i mean, after everything we've said about *****. of how a poser she is, fake accent, annoying speaking voice then all of a sudden it turns out that i'm worse than she is.

grabe! death indeed.

if you just saw me a while ago when i knew everything was a dream. i was smiling the hell out of me...ALONE. well, you've got a mad friend in me.


Wednesday, June 25, 2008
shocking news!
11:38 PM
NASHOCK YUNG BUONG BUHAY KO!!!


Tuesday, June 24, 2008
surprise surprise.
2:19 PM

2:19 pm

it was like love at first sight. a box full of things and not chocolates. but it seems like it were chocolates to me.

months i havent even glanced at you, dear box of artsy stuff. and i missed you to death. seeing you again makes me realize why i went to CFAD and not some psych course that i was dying to be in.

WOW! (and a big sigh to follow)

i found my grade 5 oil paints and other stuff. jeez!

now, i'm off to work. :)




i love you, louie. hahaha!
yes, i do have the parents charm. :)



ayan. colored na sya.
12:40 PM


kakaantay sa paint ko. wala na. colored na si panderrr at yung ka love team nya.

sana kasi photoshop nalang din yung package design eh. yun naman ang practical! san ka nakakita ng gift wrapper na hinand paint lang? AMP!



lord, help me.
11:24 AM
tic toc tic toc tic toc.

wala parin akong nagagawa sa fuckage design.

ayaw nilang hanapin yung paint ko. ang mean nila.

time is gold kaya.

pag ako kila jomp na talaga gumawa ng plate ah.

pero bat pako lalayo diba?

pwede naman akong bumili nalang sa SMB.

bat sa joli's pa?

hahahaha! (binibrainwash ko sarili ko jomp para di ako pumunta jan)

pag ako nanuod ng be kind rewind

wala na talaga!

it's over.

i am bored.



kailangan kita.
9:42 AM
maaga akong natulog kagabi at maaga rin akong nagising para sana maumpisahan na yung plate ko sa PD na due na bukas. sa kasamaang palad, hindi ko makita ang mga gamit ko pampinta. nakalimutan ko atang nirerenovate ang bahay. huli ko silang nasilayan noong bago pa magsummer. huli akong nagpaint ay nung ginagawa ko ang mga tshirts ni papa na hindi naman kailangan ng paint brush.

kailangan ko makita yung paintbrush at poster paints ko.

ang kyot kyot na nung pandang ginawa ko bago matulog eh. muka na syang hindi pinressure. hahahaha! black and white palang yan ah. pano pa kaya kung nakulayan na sya? at nalagyan ko na ng pink blush. WAAAH!

kailangan na kitang maumpisahan, dear panderrr.
ANG KYOT KYOT MO! i will marry you! :)

grabe! isang oras nang nakakalipas simula nung nagising ako. walang progreso. eto pang si keith eh nagsend nanaman ng hindi nakakatulong na mensahe tungkol kay weatherman.

PUNYETA KA KIT! PAG AKO HINDI NATAPOS, PAPATAYIN KITA!



i need insipiration.


Monday, June 23, 2008
rfdrhxguieh,rwhsehguehxri: part2
9:44 PM
pinatay mo nanaman ako for the second time around once more.
nawiwili ka na ah!
akala mo nakakatuwa ka pa??
talk to the hand!!


TAPOS BIGLA SYANG NAGOFFLINE!!!!


grabe kaya yung pagkamatay ko nun.
parang episode ng faces of death.


FACT OR FICTION? :))

tas bigla syang nagOL after my death.


SUMOSOBRA KA NA!!
stroke. stroke. stroke.



rfdrhxguieh,rwhsehguehxri
8:40 PM
pinatay mo nanaman ako! baket?! why oh why? how do you do?
kailangan ko atang kumain para mabuhay uli.

nica: tandaan mo, nica. MERRY HAPPY.
nica: merry happy. tama!
nica: ayos! okay ka na!
nica: tama tama. eat na me.


shet! sabi sainyo magiging honest na ko uli eh. alam ko namang pwede ko syang idrafts nalang pero wag na. tinatamad na me. :))

TAE YOU!
DINEAD MO ME!


(so much for honesty.)

i love my layout. and you should too, cause if not... GET OUTTA HERE!



tamad me.
5:02 PM
i'd probably stay up late till i finish my plate. you see, haven't made anything productive yet. might edit my layout first before anything else. WOW!

on season 2.5: THE PREDICTION.

nica meets NL which ends up to be PL who became her F then B who eventually becomes her NOL.



OO NA!! KILL ME NA! for those who got that! :((



fourth deadly sin: lust.
3:56 PM
yun lang.
BOW!


just in case di kayo makapaniwala na di ko to nilagay sa

series ng deadly sins.



do lister.
3:48 PM
plate days are back.

TAE TAE TAE!


do list:

next time na yung mga misc. parang kay macci.

gagawa na ko. AMP AMP!



season 2.5
3:28 AM
season 2 ended yesterday and season 2.5 starts today.

i love my season ender. it was the best of all season enders so far. it was filled with nothing but happiness, pure bliss and whatever cutesy stuff to make this thing redundant.

i dont think i have to enumerate this. or if i do, i'd be secret blogging somewhere. too private. HAHAHA! yeah right. what now with privacy?


season 2.5 starts in this setting...

its past 3 in the morning and nica, still not on the right school body clock is awake and blogging about how cool her life is and how happy it is. and after her 6th blog entry for the day, she decides to sleep. so, i'll sleep now.

PHILIPPINES TODAY IS A LIVING AIRCON.

no classes for 3 days straight. "may pasok ba bukas?" season starts again. :)



WHAT A LAUGH!
3:26 AM
"masyadong
nagmamadali."


Sunday, June 22, 2008
JNJ forever.
9:10 PM

"kung nagkataon, tatlong araw tayong magkakasama." -june

and it happened. LITERALLY!
tatlong araw nga tayong magkakasama.

nagumpisa yun nung pumunta akong banawe para sa photoshop cd nung thursday. mga past 12 ako nakarating, mga 12:30 siguro. tumambay tayo at natulog ako. naalala ko naglolokohan pa tayo na matulog ako dun pero di pala yun joke. akala ko joke. sabay kaming pumasok ng 4. actually mga 4 na kami nakaalis ng bahay ni jomp dahil baha at walang jeep. aside from that, traffic pa. 1 hour na nung nakarating kami.

magkakatabi pa kami sa likod ng room. after 30 mins, dismissed na. amp! tapos nagkwekkwek at cantunan kami after art app. pagakyat, andun na yung prof at dismissed na rin uli. tumambay sa tent tapos nung nakuha ko na gamit ko, pumunta na kami kila jomp.

ang saya ko lang nun. hindi dahil (insert reasons here) pero kasi ngayon ko lang sila nakabonding ng silang dalawa tas mababaw pero masaya. hindi pa kami uminom tapos nakinig lang ng happy songs habang tinuturuan ko sila ng photoshop.

next day.

nagising ako ng maaga, naginternet at kumain ng pancit canton tapos naglunch na. after lunch, nagpakababoy nanaman ako at natulog. nagising ng 4. kailangan na namin lumarga.



sabi kasi nila matutulog naman sila samin. akala ko joke nanaman. totoo pala. eh pinayagan ako so yun nga.

nagadventure kami. jeep-LRT1-jeep, papunta sa dorm nila june. ayos nga yung dorm nila eh next time dun naman kami. tapos jeep-trike-trike papunta samin.

kumain kami ng dinner, nanood ng narnia tas umakyat na sa attic. ang sarap lang nung feeling. parang highschool days. nung si marky nakatambay lagi sa bahay or si biers tas nagbbasketball sila dun sa ring ni nige or naghahanap ng dvd or pinapakielaman yung mga cars. kulang na nga kung pati yung caps eh kaso nakabox yung caps as of the moment. awww...boys. mahal ko kayo! ang sarap nyong tignan lang na parang bata.

natulog kami ng mga 2. ang kulit kasi ni june. kwento ng kwento tungkol sa nakakatakot na nakakatawa naman talaga AMP! tas biglang nagrrecord sya ng "popoy the sailorman" tawang tawa sya sa pangalan ni popoy. :))

ayon! 5am nagalarm kaming tatlo. pero tae yung alarm ni jompy sobra! yung doraemon na ubod ng haba na ayaw shumatap! nung 6 na at nagalarm parin yun, ako na nagpatay. saka lang nagising si jomp amp!

so ayun, nalate nanaman kami. hindi kami pwedeng magsama kasi nallate kami lagi. pero masaya lang talaga eh. nakakatuwa talaga.

nung una may flirts
life ako, tas nagkablockada life, tas nagkaADTU life, tas this summer nagkapinsan life and ngayon may JNJ nako. YEY!

ang haba ng kwento ko. ganyan yung saya ko sa nangyari eh. :)


so nagbabalak ata silang matulog sa bahay sa sabado kahit impossible na. punta nalang kayo. :)


i lvoe you, JNJ.♥


magkakasawaan kaya tayong tatlo?

wag naman sana.


more of this to come, right? SHET! grabe na yung love ko para sainyo, umaapaw na. :)) naalala ko last night sobrang di ko alam kung pano ako matutulog kasi hindi na ko sanay na di kayo kasama. HAHAHA! DEPENDENT NA KO SAINYO. tapos i kinda got over it kanina. hahaha! that fast.

oh wells, i love you again and again. forever and ever. :)


sana magkkapitbahay nalang tayo. tae ka kasi jomp, kung di binenta yung dome house eh di sana nakatira ka dun, lagi tayong tumatambay lang tas umiinom. lilibre mo ko ng ruffles cheddar and sourcream with sourcream dip tapos si june may imac at nagpphotoshop nalang sa gilid ng dome house. tas pag meals na maglalakad tayo papunta samin at chichibog. :)) SHET! kayo pala yung magffulfill ng "now and then" friends forever dream ko.



mackyboy.
8:13 PM
second attempt ko tong iblog. kasi kanina hindi napost dahil epal ang internet pagkaumuulan. alam kong madami nang nagblog about mackyboy. may kilala nga ako, buong blog nya tungkol kay mackyboy eh.

BAHALA KAYO! BLOG KO TOH! so what kung nauna kayo??


dear mackyboy,

naalala mo ba nung una tayong magkakilala? sa LTS yun, nung 2nd yr. una kitang napansin nung pinasayaw ka sa gitna ng kwarto. nabihag mo ata yung puso ko nun. sino ba namang di nagkacrush sayo nun? TANGA YUNG HINDI!

hahaha! simula nun, mejo nagkakasama na tayo ng slight. tapos nagkakatext. madalas tayong magkatext nun. tapos pumupunta ka pa sa alone time place ko (sa 7thfloor gilid stairs sa tapat ng SC) at magkkwentuhan lang tayo.

tumigil din yung mga panahon na yun kasi laging nananakaw yung cellphone mo.

hanggat isang araw, naging crush ka ni louie. sobrang naging blessing in disguise yun. simula nun madalas na uli kitang makasalamuha. ang cute sobra. naalala mo ba nung magkatext tayo tas iddate mo yung secret admirer mo sa clearance. grabe! tapos eventually, minahal mo din yung secret admirer mo. ang cute sobra! kung pwede lang ikwento yung love story nyo dito ginawa ko na eh. kaso blog ko toh! hindi blog nyo! :)) (sorry, di ko sinasadya.)

pero fine, pampasaya kay luday.

nica: gus2 mo bng madelay para makta pa c luday?
mackyboy: xempre gsto ko!
nica: kmi rin gus2 nmin.. :)

*this shouldn't be our last conversation.

and this shouldn't be our last pic together.

naging barkada ka na namin mackyboy. isa ka sa mga guys na pwede kong kunan at bigyan ng infinite hugs forever and ever. i super love you for that. you give love without thinking you need to receive more.

ang bilis ng oras. 8:00pm na ngayon. at hindi mo ko tinext kung delayed or cancelled ang flight mo. nalulungkot ako. nagbboarding na siguro kayo.

but still, im hoping na bukas, makikita mo pa si luday. kahit for a while lang. kahit hindi kami makita mo, basta si luday makita mo, im contented.

see you again in 5 years my "dear". :)
i love you. :)

mamimiss ko toh...
WOW HA!



advance halloween.
4:02 PM
last tuesday, we watched rec at geno's house. GOSH! i super enjoyed that day. the dressing up, the really really wrong judyann-onemig kissing and pacute scenes, the comfy-est bed EVER, the perfection-in-a-box contis cake, the uber sweet hot choco and the horror movies.

after watching judyann and onemigs kissing scene.
nica: (tumakbo sa kwarto ni geno) TANGINA! NAGKISS SI JUDY ANN AT ONEMIG! TANGINA TALAGA! AYOKO NA MAKIPAGHALIKAN EVER!!
jihan and geno: weh! di nga...?
nica: de...joke lang. HAHAHAHA!

pero kadiri talaga eh. UGH!



when we were watching solstice, parang chillax mode lang. pahiga higa lang. pag may scary part naghholding hands nalang at onting pikit ng mata. PERO REC, hoe emm.

too bad i didnt get to take a picture of us and our positions. from the higa mode, biglang lumayo kami from the laptop and we were all sitting down just waiting for what happens next. one of the best decisions i made in life is watching this with friends and NOT ALONE!

TAE! I WILL DIE IF I DID!

originally, we were supposed to watch silent hill but we could find a cd so after watching rec, we ended up watching silent hill trailers, exorcist, the hauntening benta shit and other attempt scary videos which ended up to be funny in a way.



see how squater this video is. pero natawa ako sobra. TAE ME!

i wish i could post the other vid, the one with the crib. i cant find it though.

WAAH! thanks geno and bes for commuting with me. kung hindi, namatay na ko sa takot. FOREVER!



an update, finally.
2:54 PM
it's been raining for half a day now and probably there'll be no classes tomorrow. i'm hoping.

it's 3:06 in the afternoon and it's cold. i'm nearly freezing to death but i have my hot choco beside me. i'm blogging. i'm WOW! i'm loving this to bits. not worrying about anything as of the moment not even plates.

so, i must blog about what happened days ago. tae! friends already blogged about it and i will make gaya. HAHAHA! conyo amp! :)


Monday, June 16, 2008
too good and more.
10:44 PM
sheesh! i like hannah montana. :| after months of backstabbing her and her blond hair that looks like a wig. i'm finally amused by her. and i love her songs. it's so teeny bopper-ish.

i also have the weirdest bukol EVER! palubog sya. weird weird. anyhoos, mommy earl, durrrd, wifey, mac and genorrr kissed my bukol tonight. made me feel better but it still hurts though.

nice day. from the lunch at glorias, the tenten game, the night at the tent. wow! too good to be true. season2 for nica is ending on sunday. season3 airs on monday and gosh i am excited.


and on the dark side.


"he touches her skin with force
it wasn't hurt but satisfaction
the need, the hunger, the sin
it exists flowing into her vains
tickles her insides like butterflies
she closes her eyes
to feel it even deeper
the surreal moment was it untrue?
it goes round and round
over and over it comes and goes
like a never ending game
frustration will vanish
and by the end of the day
as the place closes and lights turned off
the ferris wheel will eventually stop
as they head their way on top"


i admire meaningful conversations rather than a waste of time hearing nothing but the crickets. and although i believe in what i want, it sounds crazy that for some reason, the heart tells not the other way around but in a way a contradiction. that, yes, i am contented with the crickets as long as there's company. someone who jives along with the crickets, the smoky air, the slightly full moon, and the filthy ground. sometimes, you need not learn from words but from the unspoken, the boring, the nothingness.

i'm possessed right now. and so, i must sleep.




"i am whole. and with you, i'm exaggeratedly complete."


Sunday, June 15, 2008
scary shit!
11:59 PM
gagawa na nga ako ng must watch sa right side ng blog ko.

i have to watch rec movie din. kung gusto nyong panuorin din yun, PLEASE! ISAMA NYO NA KO! di ko kaya panoorin magisa eh. :((



SHET! pinost ko. :(( this blog is haunted now. PLEASE! anyone who cares to join me watch this? hanap kayo ng dvd tas sabay sabay natin panoorin. :-S (kung gusto nyong isipin na nagjojoke lang ako, OKAY LANG. :( im paking scurrred!)

imma die now.

friend,
tabi tayo ha? wag mo kong iiwanan. di ka pwedeng magCR habang nanunuod nung quarantine. MAGKAMATAYAN NA! hindi naman siguro tayo magkaaway by october diba? hehehe! sana hindi.


imma die now.



i cant stop saying the word with "fuck" in it.
10:25 PM
i need a fucking secret secret blog. where in i could still place things uncensored. fearing nothing. but i guess that's kinda impossible as of the moment. so i have to deal with this set up first.

blogging "un" secretly sucks. :((

no "friends" today. i dont feel like liking them today. GAH! having a crush on someone is so boring. darn it! why am i like this?

i'm actually confused right now. my brain is going mad. thoughts are so mixed up. and i feel so stupid for doing stupid things, for feeling stupid things, for saying stupid things. so i'm having a debate club here: nica1 vs. nica2.

some of you might still remember them for some reason. i, weird as it may be, cant really tell which is which. i barely use nica1 and nica2. it was forgotten. the idea is still there though. 1 and 2 are the opposites, so if you knew it before, you'll get what i'm about to say now.

it sucks. having nica 1 and 2 around. it's better to have one of them around. i'm guessing the latter one is better? (sheesh! i can't believe i really forgot which is which) whatever! i'm still in favor with the "angry" one (whatever that is).

can't help myself not wait. not wait WAIT, but wait. NOT WAIT WAIT! ugh! wrong term. wait isn't the term that i should be using. forget what i just said.

okay, since i can't explain what the hell i am thinking right now. here are keywords.

i promise you, that i will be honest in the future.


HEY YOU! YOU DONT HAVE THE FUCKING RIGHT TO TELL ME WHAT IS RIGHT OR WRONG. the hell?! i dont trust you and your opinions. NOT AT ALL! (magkaibang tao si hey you at hey there.) ((grabe warfreak mode.))

i'm addicted to sleeping. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.



one in a million.
7:06 PM
this is a happy song. :)


"I said 'pinch me, where's the catch this time?'
Can't find a single cloud in the sky
Help me before I get used to this guy

They say that good things take time
But really great things happen in a blink of an eye."



pfft!
6:23 PM
hey there, I LOVE YOU but i cant understand you. sometimes i feel like i'm considering myself on liking you, but we clash. we do. and it's not only me who thinks of that. sheesh! will anyone adjust for us?

i guess no one will.

not now. not yet.


Saturday, June 14, 2008
bothered-ish.
1:10 AM
hindi naman masamang kiligin ako diba?

DIBA DIBA DIBA?????

crush ko lang naman sya eh. (defensive mode) ayoko na magkwento tungkol dun sa girl. poknat! AKO YUN! AKO YUN! :)) obvious naman na ako yun eh. kalokohan.

GRABE! kung ganito lang naman lagi eh noh? fun fun lang.



weee! my cousins went here kanina. kala ko di na sila tuloy cause 4 na wala parin sila. shet!! they went home ng 12 midnight-ish. antok na ko nun big time. pero ngayon gising parin ako. AMP AMP!

kachat ko pa kanina si friend2. sheesh! pinasaya-ish nya yung gabi ko. BWAHAHAHA! kalokohan talaga. tawang tawa pa ko kila chichi at nikki. f na f nila na kinikilig talaga ako kay friend2. kung ano anong punch lines-ish pa kasi yung mga sinabi ko eh. :)) AMP!! kinda joke lang yun. wala lang akong magawa. fun eh! :)

hindi nanaman ako pinahinga ni friend1 kanina btw. lagi naman eh! amp!

BAKET???

sabi nga ni jordin sparks at chris brown,
"If you ain't here, I just can't breathe there's no air, no air"

joke lang, walang kinalaman yung song. ang labo pala nung lyrics. walang ka connect.


chichi, iyah and nica date.
aside from the neoprints slash purikuras.

i won the games. :)




yay! i edited this one. CUTIE! :)



Friday, June 13, 2008
sumusobra na kayo!
11:58 PM
so diba nga may girl? tapos grabe! nababaliw na sya.

kasi yung kwento nya sakin, si friend1, kiniss at hinug sya kagabi. tapos, syempre kinilig sya. pero carry lang. basta nacute-an lang sya. ewan, basta! sya nalang tanungin mo.

tapos kanina, si friend2 naman kinindatan sya, nagblush, kiniss sya at hinug sya. basta, hindi ko alam kung totoo ba yung kilig na nararamdaman nya nun. parang totoo eh. pero basta natatawa lang sya. ewan shet!

ang dami nyang friends.


disclaimer: hindi ako yung girl.



my kwento ako.
2:09 PM
meron kasing isang girl tapos may friend sya. yung friend nyang yun, dati frienemy nya. tas so yun nga, friends na sila. ayun, masaya lang.

PERO!

biglang nung friends na sila. may dumating na isa pang friend.


ngayon, naguguluhan na yung girl kung sino yung mas favorite nyang friend. yung sexy ba nyang friend or yung sehkseh nyang friend.


SHET NICA, PIGILAN MO SARILI MO. :))
(promise, hindi ako yung girl na to. tangenang disclaimer.)


Thursday, June 12, 2008
marathon
11:33 PM
i wanted to blog a lot of stuff right now. A LOT! but i have to sleep now. so just for the sake of blogging something tonight, i'll list movies that i have to watch soon.

AMP! told you it was a lot.



badword.
12:02 AM
oo na! mura na ko ng mura. HINDI KO KAYA! give up na ko sa kaban na yan! mamumulubi ako pagnagpatuloy pa yan.


nakita ni mama yung doodle page ng notebook ko nung "darkest dark dark night" ko. puro mura sya. (biruin mo kahit sa doodles nagmumura ako.)

IMMA DIE NOW!


Wednesday, June 11, 2008
dads text.
10:50 PM
"Anak, jomp, super salamat talaga sa binigay nyo sakin. Sobrang valuable yung fact na pinagisipan nyo talaga. At syempre, yung fact din na nagpakahirap pa kayo hanapin yung mga yun. Sobrang natouch ako sa letter. Napakathoughtful nyong dalawa. Hindi ko aakalaing magkakaron ako ng family like you. Sobrang thank you sainyong dalawa for making it such a special day for me. Love you guys. :D"



naluha ish talaga ako sa message nyang yan. :((

ang sweet natin daddy kanina. :)) I LOVE YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAIN. :)


Tuesday, June 10, 2008
could not ask for more.
11:44 PM
if i'm not to count the purple skinny jeans, lisa frank back pack and me being filthy rich in the near future, then i have nothing more to ask for.

this year seemed to have been in favor of me as far as i could remember. yes, there were the "bad" days. i cant deny that. but come to think of it, i had every single bit of whateverness wishes i wanted. from the ups and the downs, i've actually prayed for it to happen. and i got it just the way i wanted it.

things move in mysterious ways. (hindi lang love.)

today was the unofficial first day of classes. and i have been saying the word "friendship" a million times. i hate it. as well as the others who've spent the day with me from 8am to 8pm.

this was the first official "friends" day for me and jomp. we spent the whole afternoon together till 8pm. it was fun. it was happy. it was normal. on the way home, i was thinking if kinikilig ako or what. and my brain processed an answer in a snap, "walang kilig, just happy."

thats how we enjoy, we annoy each other. asaran na walang katapusan.

people may not understand me or believe what i've been saying for the past days. like this must be another bullcrap by me for brainwashing my brain, heart, blog and all the people around me for telling the world that "yes, we're just friends. nothing more, nothing less." but it is true. you have to believe me by now.

i see him positively if we're friends. he's funny, slow, annoyingly fun, immature and other blah blahs. nakakatuwa lang and nakakatawa. GRABE! ETO LANG YUNG GUSTO KO! ETO YUNG "HAPPY DAYS" WITH HIM. tamang cheverness lang. swabe.


"it is for the BITTERment of the human kind." -nica (oo, ako si nica.)

starting tomorrow, MAGMUMURA TAYONG LAHAT! 5 pesos din yun bawat mura para naman bongga ang once a month bisyo nights natin. :))


dear jompy,
kung nababasa mo tong blog ko ngayon, pinapaalala ko lang sayo yung "surprise" mo sakin. sana wag mong makakalimutan yun. hahaha! kailangan ko na yun ASAP para may magamit na ko. :)) (oo na demanding na ko amp!) yiiiiii! surprise! (na alam ko na. sorry! taenang spinoil ko yung surprise para sakin amp!)


gusto ko ikwento yung nangyari today pero bukas ko nalang ibblog.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DURRRD! :)



ube.
1:02 AM





ANYTHING
BETTER THAN
THIS?


i
dont
think so.


*nuffsaid.*


Monday, June 9, 2008
this is sad.
11:16 AM
fuckity fuck fuck!

no more what happens in vegas. :(


good thing i knew it before hand. or else, i must've stabbed people at g4 to death. sheesh! so, we're left with made of honor, narnia, SITC, and kungfu panda.

i think im going for either kungfu panda or made of honor. iyah already watched SITC the other day, no choice. and besides, i dont like narnia. ehk! pffffttt!!


i guess i'll end up watching what happens in vegas at http://watch-movies.net



friendship. (HAHAHA! fuck!)
3:33 AM
im glad we're friends again. AND! i have no plans of fighting you in the near future. ugh! boring.

so, its us again and our FOREVER FRIENDSHIP! (putangena! friendship nanaman! sana nabblock ng blogspot yung word na friendship.)


friends nalang talaga tayo. promise! hahaha! kasi nga, mas masaya tayo nung friends lang tayo. walang complications, walang whatevers. blahblahblah. and the list goes on.

MATULOG KA NA! POTA! gusto pa malaman tong blog. matulog ka na!

im glad we're friends again. :)



i once said.
3:31 AM
"and this all happened in may.
and it must end in may."

and it did. whoa! what a vision board this is. you, blog, you. :)



nakalimutan ko iblog: part2.
3:22 AM
wala lang. narealize ko na ang loving ko na now-a-days.

basta!

and mas "intimate" ish na yung friendship ko sa lahat ng tao. (putangena! friendship nanaman! kalokohan!)


goal ko ngayon in life eh, tumigil sa kakafriendship ko. :))

BASTA! sabi nga ni ashlee simpson, "L. O. L. O. L. O. L. O. V. E."



nakalimutan ko iblog: part1.
12:14 AM
naguusap kami ni louie sa pool nung next morning.

nica: iniisip ko nga nung gabi, kung iiyak ba ako dahil kay jomp pagnakainom na. pero hindi eh! hahaha! pero umiyak parin ako ibang dahilan lang. tae si macci eh. ayoko sya nakikitang ganun e. ang weak nya. :(
louie: oo nga, ako din. pero nagulat nga ako eh. hindi parin ako makapaniwala.
nica: na?
louie: na ang bilis mong nakamove on.
nica: hahaha! oo nga eh! kahit ako hindi ako makapaniwala eh. pero carry lang. atleast diba? ang saya ko. :)


Sunday, June 8, 2008
pogz.
8:37 PM
napanaginipan ko si paul kanina. OMG! crush ko parin sya. sana makita ko sya uli. :)) yun yung pinakanakakakilig na dream na naranasan ko shet!

POTCHA POTCHA POTCHA! sana totoo nalang.

hahaha! kadiri. ang highschool. those were the days.



marami pang ganyan sa future.
7:46 PM
nagonline sya kanina.

tulad ng mga ibang pagOL nya, kinabahan ako. gusto ko syang kausapin pero mukhang hindi naman nya ko kakausapin. eto nalang yung problema ko eh. na hindi kami bati. ayoko ng ganito eh. mabigat parin sa pakiramdam sa totoo lang.

gusto ko lang syang ikaibigan uli. yun lang. hindi ko na naman mamahalin tong taong toh tulad ng dati. hindi na sya worthy nun eh. grabe! ang kapal nya talaga.

pero inaamin ko, ngayon, nasasaktan parin nya pala ako. shet! iyak mode. :)) (punyeta! hindi ko matago na ang saya ko parin. hindi talaga ako nasasaktan.) sana mas madali lang talaga kung hindi kami magkablock eh. yun lang. pero HINDI EH! sana magirreg sya. hahaha! tangena! ayoko ngang ako yung magirreg. in your face!

yuck! miss ko na sya maging friend. ayoko magtanim ng galit sakanya. bilang tao, worthy parin naman sya ng friendship ko. (ayan nanaman ako sa friendship.) alam ko kasi, sa pagtagal, kung ganitong hindi kami magkaibigan. kaya kong masanay dito to the point na wala na kong pakielam kahit wala na sya sa buhay ko. alam ko kasi nangyari na yan noon. sa ibang tao nga lang.

LORD! TULUNGAN MO KO PLEASE! (sorry, kinda tinulugan kita kanina.)

KAYA KO TOH! aja! (amp talaga si terrance, nagoffline online nanaman.)


Saturday, June 7, 2008
so fresh, i could still taste it.
7:07 PM
hey hey hey! the awaited "outing" was finally over.

there were no expectations on my side. i just wanted to surprise myself a little because the planning and everything was hard. although there's this side in me thats hoping that it would be really really fun. sorta better than the last outing. until one by one, people were backing out. it was depressing. never thought that it would still push through.

surprise yourself, nica.

there were 12 of us. 12 out of a whatever number. i got to set aside all my "tampo" when i realized what a blessing in disguise it was.

imagine if we were around 20, then probably we'd be commuting instead of safely riding at teta's l300. as miguel said, "the lesser, the merrier." for some reason, i felt that we should stand up for it (im talking about the quote). so what, if we weren't as many as before? that shouldn't hinder us from enjoying this so called ''block" outing.

and you know whats funny? from that 12 people who joined, only 7 of us are originally from adtu.
AND DO YOU KNOW WHATS EVEN FUNNIER THAN THAT? an arki joined us. he's from arki but he managed to come. hahaha! guest of honor.


im listing here "events" that happened during our stay at dorae's resort at tagaytay.

i originally wanted to put everything in details but i guess my left energy cant do that yet. super how i wish i could tell you how happy it was. it was just the way i wanted it to be. perfect. relaxed. no pressure.

grabe! the moments were too funny to be true.

it was the first outing na masaya ako simply because im with my friends and we're just fucking enjoying the day. ever since i was allowed to go to outings, i was always stuck guy-wise. my basis of being happy in a trip was if we had a moment or something with the guy. or basta, if he wasn't there, my mind was preoccupied by him. it was unhealthy. but now, gosh! i was just so truly truly truly happy. im just happy because i have myself and i have a great bunch of friends around me.

the food was great and we were just high all along. fine, there were dramas but without it, for sure it wouldn't be as fun.

that group of 12, few to even say that it was a block outing, played a role that will never be forgotten. it was composed of everything i needed and wanted. love, care, happiness, fun, laughter, tears, comfort, protection, trust, respect, strength and the assurance that they'll never leave you.

not all of them present knew each other for a long time but it was indeed a friendship worth keeping. in friendship, time is never the basis. so what kung ngayon lang nakilala? but it was true. it was true.

taenang dumideep na ko. friendship na pinaguusapan ko. goodnight, loves.



here, do you want to know how fun it was? it was so fun, we barely used the camera to whore. it was so fun, we didn't need it to show others how fun it was for proof. it was so fun, i was happy inside out.



"having fun doesn't mean you're happy. being happy doesn't always require fun. why not have both?"

WE HAD BOTH. :)


Friday, June 6, 2008
i am sleepy.
3:09 AM
there are things that you regret. i know that. and im sorry you have to feel that way. i wish i could just take whatever you're feeling away. you dont deserve the sadness, dear.


blah blah blah.

i've learned a lot from this so called "heartbreak". it was a blast. grabe! kung dati ayokong maiwan sa bahay cause it would kill me, ngayon grabe! KAYA KO NA ULI! OMG! the happy songs were definitely working. blogs, videos and music helped a lot.

being in love with someone is great. fine, i wont argue with that. but you see, it wasnt as fun as you think it is. of course there are moments when you get hurt and all that bullcrap. i learned that being in love with yourself is just one of the most perfect kind of love ever. no pain. no sadness. no whatever kinda negative stuff. plain and simple.

infairness, kinilig ako sa sarili ko kanina. which is weird.

shit! ang ewan ko na. sobrang hindi makatotohanan. :))


ang dami kong gustong sabihin eh. kanina pa. pero antok na ko sobra. outing pa bukas. spare some braincells for tomorrow. YEAH!


SPREAD THE LOVE. <3

(halatang "im sleepy" talaga. may mga nabasa akong typo. at parang ang labo nung sinasabi ko. sorry guys. 6:59pm june7)



familove.
2:14 AM
i was a family anti social (how ironic). when i was growing up, slowly i stopped hanging out with my cousins. they, well...they still managed to stick together since they live closer to each other. you see, we all live in merville but my house is at the other end. i was lazy.

there were years when i just see them during christmas, new year and birthdays. that's it. they had a different lingo already. i didnt get it. so i stayed far. it was never a drama. emo-ish as it sounds. no it wasn't. i had fun being alone. being with them was my alone time. i was like partying even more deep inside.

when i heard about the golden wedding. it was like, "WEH??". i felt that i would bore myself to death. days and nights spent with them would be a "surprise". i have no idea on how to even talk to them. anong topic? shit!

pero it was a blessing. grabe! GRABE GRABE GRABE! i just loved spending nights with them. PUCHA!! SHIT SHIT SHIT! i love them cousins.

(wala na, nagddrama na ko.)



WE BAAAAAD!

i miss the late night practices. actually the ''practices''. hahaha! i miss our planners. sheesh! i miss hearing those songs. the overnights. the food fest. i miss us getting tired and hyper at the same time.

i love you younger cousin sisters/brothers. hahaha! shit! i miss jaja and yung ilong nyang CLASSIC.


MAHAL KO KAYO!


Thursday, June 5, 2008
changes.
8:21 PM
haven't packed yet for tomorrows outing. am i excited? OF COURSE I AM! so why am i not yet packing?

KASI NAMAN!! NAMISPLACE NG MGA KARPINTERO YUNG KAHON NG DAMIT KO!!! a box full of clothes currently missing in action.



jeez!


the happy vibes is all over meh! i spent 2 days downloading new, unknown, party like/happy/funfun songs.

ITS ALL OVER ME!! :)

pucha, ang party girl. (which is so not me) ELEL! :))


a lot did change, nica-wise.

ang saya ko lang talaga. NEVER BETTER! :) and words are so not worthy to describe them happiness.



fat pig.
7:49 PM
"the secret to eating more...

is drinking less."




i learn from them.
6:08 PM
being a kid is so envious. making them happy is easier. they have very shallow philosophies. they believe in anything they want to believe in. so laid back. stressless.


when i was in hongkong, i saw macci's "definition of strength paper" in one of my planner pages. i dont know how it got there but here it is.

"Strength is the ability to make great changes despite the consequences.
Strength is the ability to adapt to changes.
Strength is positive thinking in spite of challenges and difficulties.
Strength is grace under pressure.
Strength is calmness.
Strength is being able to think straight and proper.
Strength is accepting blame and keeping an open mind.
Strength is kindness.
Strength is an outlook that makes things better instead of bleak.
Strength is standing up.
Strength is living under correct principles.
Strength is betterness for others and for yourself.
Strength is finding happiness."

everything she said here wasn't wrong at all. yes, strength is a lot of things. and my brother defines it in a different way.

"strength is being able to crush a del monte fruit juice can."

simple as that. and if thats the basis of strength, then i am not strong enough. :)

the little things you learn from the little minds.


Wednesday, June 4, 2008
test no. 2
2:33 PM
first time kong in-on uli ung 3650 ko para masend ko kay kuya ayla yung picture ng jeffy notebook na nakita ko sa HK.

as i was browsing my phone, i saw his message folder.

yung mga messages nya na, "hindi bako lovable?" ,"eh huggable? huggable din ba ko?", saka yung, "ah gnun, pag ako naghanap ng iba! joke lang..."

grabe! those were the happy days.



HAPPY DAYS!

and its gone now.
YUCK DRAMA!



naluha ako bigla.

tinest nanaman ako ni God. thanks, God.



test no. 1
1:50 PM
hongkong days were one of the happiest alone days i had EVER. it was my first time to shop without thinking about him. SUPER COOL!

not the point.


(i'll be blogging about hongkong trip at multiply.)


not the point again.



so as we were heading home, i realized something.

nica's thoughts, "so hindi na ko in love sakanya? oo nga! we are better off as friends lang. as in! sobrang okay kami pagfriends kami kesa more than that. SHET! ang galing! oo nga. tama! hindi na ko in love sakanya! im so happy."

so syempre, ang yabang ko. i went home na sobrang proud sa bagong realization ko. blahblahblah!

biglang pagonline ko kagabi, bigla syang nagOL.

BIGLA DIN AKONG KINABAHAN! as in sobrang. dubdub-dubdub.

TAE!!!

fine, in love pa ata ako. OR SOMETHING. or baka gusto ko pa kasi sya. PERO HINDI NA KO IN LOVE! tama tama. good point, nica.

grabe! ang bilis akong itest ni God. thanks, God.